With snow forecast for parts of Traveler Country tomorrow, and holiday music shivering through TVs and radios everywhere, it’s time to talk about keeping warm.

No matter what you do outdoors, if you are cold and wet, it’s miserable. With some interests intent on selling you this or that high tech miracle solution (usually quite pricey as well), here are a few tips for keeping warm and dry, (or at least wet and comfortable) even on a small budget.

So, what expertise do I have on this? I go caving. No matter if it’s mid-July or mid-December, Missouri caves are usually wet with air temps in the mid-50s, but water temps can go as low as 40 or as warm as 60ish depending on snowmelt or rain inflow. At those temperatures, we’re always skirting hypothermia, even if the rocks are hot enough to fry flapjacks outside.

Like hunters, anglers, hikers and other outdoor people, we’re thrashing through brush, fighting stinging nettle and hawthorn on the way to the cave, liable to slip and rip whatever we’ve got on. Add clay-staining milkshake mud, wading in streams, and sometimes swimming underground to the mix, and it’s really clear we’d be in the poorhouse, (or naked) if we bought that fragile miracle fleece and threw away our clothing as soon as it didn’t look like that worn by outdoor fashion models. (Where do they get those people, anyway? I bet they’re standing in a studio with an outdoor backdrop behind them.)

So how do you keep warm and keep your change in your pocket for that cup of coffee?

1. Cotton kills. When you pick your outdoor clothing for warmth, straight cotton is the worst thing you can choose. Animal fiber, fur, feathers or most synthetics all shed water to a certain extent. Cotton just gets wet, sticks to your body and wicks body heat, not water. While cotton is durable, and I know many people who wear waterproofed cotton as an outer layer because it breathes, your inner layers should be wool or synthetic (polypropylene, nylon, rayon, or polyester all work). Merino wool makes great, non-scratchy long underwear. If you just can’t give up your jeans, find some cotton/poly “relaxed fit” ones, not 100% cotton.
2. Put a lid on it. Wear a hat, preferably one which covers your ears. Between 60 and 70% of your body heat escapes through your head. There’s a reason those mountain men have long hair and beards, and it’s not entirely a fashion statement. Stocking or watch caps of synthetic fibers are cheap. Find someone who loves to knit, and have them make you one from 100% wool as a birthday present. Missouri temps rarely call for a full face ski mask, but if the weather calls for it, wear one, (but avoid going to the bank while doing so.)
3. Long underwear isn’t just for kids. Make it wool, or polypro, or a wool/synthetic blend. Your grandpa may have sworn by his waffle-pattern cotton whities, but there is that cotton word again. Your long underwear should fit, or even be a little big. You want to be able to move beneath outer clothes, and all of it will shrink a tad over time. If you have to save your pennies for an investment in something new, put it into your long underwear.
4. Think hoods. Sweatshirts, coats, parkas — every outside layer should have a hood. Even if you are wearing a hat or cap, having a hood traps heat and pumps it between your head and body. If it has a drawstring, so much the better. We’re talking warm, not fashion statement.
5. Warm feet are happy feet. nylon or acrylic thin socks, then bulky wool socks, then waterproof boots and you have happy feet. If you really have chilly toes, you might consider scuba socks –thin neoprene booties. Outdoor stores sell them to pair with waders, but those which are truly socks can be worn on land, too. Check with any scuba stores in your region, and online, too. Plastic or rubber boots might seem just the ticket, but both make your feet sweat, and then, get cold. For land, waterproofed leather is much better for warmth.
6. Warm to the core. After your head, the most important thing to keep warm is your body core. Best solution? Layers: long underwear, thin wool or synthetic shirt, wool sweater, vest or outer shirt, then a breathable. water shedding outer layer.

So: you’ve just spent my whole paycheck on keeping warm. Where’s the cheap?

Cavers learned long ago to shop secondhand and vintage shops in well-to-do neighborhoods, check labels, and turn a blind eye to trendiness. (Most people buy long underwear new. But often, not much else.) Plain wool sweaters ($40-50 new) can be picked up for $5. It doesn’t hurt so much if you trash a $5 sweater. One fellow has incorporated 100% polyester leisure suits from the 70s and early 80’s as cave gear– it stretches, is warm when wet, and people are embarrassed to sell them for over a buck or two.

Right now are the deer hunter clearance closeouts, both at local discounters and online. Google “outdoor discount outlets”, “ski outlets”, “scuba outlets” for seconds, blems, overstocks. Comparison shop. We may not hunt, but don’t mind camo or blaze orange which will all be mud colored soon enough. True military surplus, especially warm stuff from northern European countries, is quite reasonably priced. (Avoid fake “military outfitters” — most carry cheap (in the worst sense) stuff. The place should smell like gun oil, and dust, with merchandise heaped everywhere.)

Keep warm. Stay dry (or at least comfortable if wet.) Spend less. Have fun.